Thursday, August 14, 2014

Saying Goodbye

It's a new season of life

Dear Friend,

It's time for me to let go.

July held some big goodbyes for me. Goodbye to an apartment I loved. Goodbye to a person I loved. And after three years, I finally said goodbye to a dress I loved.

My wedding dress.

It was exactly what I wanted. Sparkly. Elegant. Feminine. Princessy. On clearance. (You know how I love a good deal) After losing 20 pounds during my engagement, I went through several rounds of alterations to give it the perfect fit. I loved that dress. I felt like the most beautiful bride in the world.

Photo by Fleur de Lis Photography
I wish I could say the beautiful dress was the beginning of a beautiful happily-ever-after marriage. But I let go of that too. (read more here)

When packing up my apartment to move in with new friends in a new part of the city, I decided it was time to let go of the dress and all it represented. It was time for me to embrace the closure. I couldn't justify continuing to carry it around with me from place to place anymore when all it did was remind me of broken promises and dead dreams. So, I pulled it out of the closet and set it with the other items I was leaving behind. But not before wearing it one last time. I couldn't believe it still fit -- a little too tight perhaps, or maybe it was just my heart inside my chest that was tight. I donated it to Goodwill the next day, which ironically would have been my third wedding anniversary.

The love of a dress

My best friend recently told me that getting to know yourself when you're alone after you say these kind of goodbyes is a beautiful thing. I'm finally starting to see that. I'm starting to look at myself differently than before. What I want has changed. And what I want is to stop blogging.

I started blogging for reasons that are no longer relevant. I work days and more hours per week than before. I make less money but dress better than before. I still want to explore the city but not through the screen of my phone as I snap pictures and think of how to share them through social media to maximize clicks. I still want to explore my creative side but only for myself like I used to when I journaled and wrote poems and songs and other random things.

What I'm saying, I suppose, is I want to live my life for me right now in a different way than before and to do that I need to say goodbye to you.

Thank you for reading, commenting and supporting me. I'll still be on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter but I'm closing the book now on this blog and this chapter of my life.

Love, love.


  1. <3 I am so happy to see you following your heart, wherever it may take you! I wish you the best of luck in these non-blogging exploits!!

  2. I just found your post from FB (Share the Blog Love) and I'm sad that this is the first time I'm seeing your blog. Your posts are raw and full of emotion! I'm glad you are following your heart. Your posts hit close to home because I'm on the other end of your story. My husband asked for a divorce, but the details pertaining to it were TERRIBLE (cheating, new girlfriend, etc.) Now, here we are 2 months after the fact (divorce papers in, but can pull them if need be and house up for sale), and he realized he made a bad decision. So, here I am stuck at the decision I need to make.....

  3. I am riveted and touched by this blog post and the one you attached to it that tells your story. I'm sorry that I just discovered you on the day that you say goodbye to blogging! You are a real gem and I'm glad that you are learning to dream a new dream one with you at the center as you write a new chapter in your life. I wish you many blessings doll! :)

  4. Wow! I love your blog and your honesty. I have read a few of your posts, and as happy as I am to hear that you are going out there and living your life to the fullest without the blog, I selfishly wish that your stories continued on this blog. You are a great writer. Good luck in all that you do dear! :)


  6. I am sorry my dear to hear about. You may still collect same dress at